The security of childhood

[Lozzer]

I sincerely miss the security of childhood. Being young is the only legitimate reason we have in life to remain ignorant of the outside world--because we are not allowed to know any better. Its a very strange thing to be a child, you exist outside the domain of reality. Death does not happen to people, only to one's pet Goldfish. The Earth is the centre of the Universe, and the Universe is a very small place indeed--and wars are only fought in the old films you watch with your dad on the sofa. The shadow of the monster really exists on your bedroom wall, but the monsters inside peoples heads do not. The bed time lullabies your Nan sings to you make perfect sense and drugs are something only very evil people take.

But then you hit 11. But then you hit the age of 12 and 13 and 14. As your body mature your mind is trying to do the opposite. Having to learn and grasp the real world is torturous, and the only way to alleviate the transition is through narcotics--you think you're evil, but the human beings which supply and take such drugs are not, curiosity arises and you soon begin to resent the lies of your parents. Not only does the Goldfish die, but soon your Nan does too and then your closest friends. Wars are waged and people executed--you can find the executions on the internet if you're curious enough. Your dad leaves your mum and reproduces with another woman--while your own mum struggles to keep you in house and home. The monsters shadow becomes a reality as you combat and repress jealousy, lust, anguish, reality, lies and the realisation that Man isn't just Fallen in old fables.

And yet, I wouldn't have it any other way. Life can be good but its immutably unstable. The transition will always happen and continue to happen to me even when I am fully grown and acknowledged as a legal adult by society. So bugger it

[Xamonas Chegwé]

A very touching piece lozzer. But think yourself lucky that you had that period of stability in which to grow. There are any number of countries in which you would have been working for a living by the age of 6. You could have been born to junky parents on a sink estate and rented out to paedos in return for drug-money. You could have been raised by fundie xtians, or muslims, or in some other fucked-up cult.

Sounds like you had a good beginning to your life. Reality kicked in a little later than it does for many, but earlier than it does for others. Your closing paragraph shows you grasp that clearly. You don't sound too screwed up to me. In fact, you sound a lot older than many of twice your age.

[FBM]

A very touching piece lozzer. But think yourself lucky that you had that period of stability in which to grow. There are any number of countries in which you would have been working for a living by the age of 6. You could have been born to junky parents on a sink estate and rented out to paedos in return for drug-money. You could have been raised by fundie xtians, or muslims, or in some other fucked-up cult.

Sounds like you had a good beginning to your life. Reality kicked in a little later than it does for many, but earlier than it does for others. Your closing paragraph shows you grasp that clearly. You don't sound too screwed up to me. In fact, you sound a lot older than many of twice your age.

No shit.

[Chinaski]

Hey! How come I never got a compliment like that? Jeez.

Anyway, nice piece. Are we supposed to debate this now?

[Xamonas Chegwé]

I don't think we're supposed to do anything.

[Lozzer]

I don't think we're supposed to do anything.

Yes, wallow in my fine act of sincerity! Wallow!

[Rum]

I have often thought that reality is childhood and that all the rest of life is a slow degradation. There is 'magic' in it which slowly seeps away until there is only the fact of mortality left.

[Lozzer]

I have often thought that reality is childhood and that all the rest of life is a slow degradation. There is 'magic' in it which slowly seeps away until there is only the fact of mortality left.

Only idealistic reality exists in childhood.

[Xamonas Chegwé]

I have often thought that reality is childhood and that all the rest of life is a slow degradation. There is 'magic' in it which slowly seeps away until there is only the fact of mortality left.

Childhood's delusions give way to adolescent delusions which in turn make way for adult delusions.

No adult can see a flower with the wide-eyed wonder of a child. Not without LSD.

No child can appreciate the consequences and possible finality of its actions, just as no adult can escape them.

[Pappa]

No adult can see a flower with the wide-eyed wonder of a child. Not without LSD.

I don't know. I can, from time to time. Just occasionally I find myself looking at some detail of the world with the wonder a child. I don't know if it's just my personality, or maybe it was all the LSD I did years ago (both I suppose).

[Trolldor]

Today I found a moth - massive, easily the size of my palm with it's wings folded.
It was struggling to crawl across the sparse grass at the foot of the shed. From its end it secreted what we (the girl from down the hall) thought were eggs.
I watched with a wild fascination as it desperately sought to move itself to a shelter, away from us - she having picked it up, as amazed with it as I was, but a little less afraid of insects.
It slowly crept up the wall where it settled, still, clearly and distinctly visible on the bricks.
And it made me wonder. It was so very ordinary, and that is why it caught me off-guard. I was seeing a fraction of a world I would never know or understand, for the first time and perhaps the last.

There is majesty and wonder all around us, in everything. All you have to do is really look at what you're seeing.

[Xamonas Chegwé]

No adult can see a flower with the wide-eyed wonder of a child. Not without LSD.

I don't know. I can, from time to time. Just occasionally I find myself looking at some detail of the world with the wonder a child. I don't know if it's just my personality, or maybe it was all the LSD I did years ago (both I suppose).

Glimpses. I'll concede that. But never the complete wonder at everything.

I can clearly remember how I always used to imagine what might be at the end of a street that I used to pass on the school bus every day. It was a narrow, little street that went downhill into tall trees and then turned a corner - in my imagination that street led to nightmares and treasures in equal measure. I just can't get that excited about a street I haven't been down anymore - my sense of what might be is dimmed by time.

[Animavore]

Ah the good old days. When Jaws and Thriller had me running off screaming and crying, the Fraggles and Muppets were real and girls were yucky aliens.

To be 24 again.

[Pappa]

I just can't get that excited about a street I haven't been down anymore - my sense of what might be is dimmed by time.

I think it's a matter of degree though. It is possible to recapture the mindset, but most of the time we have more pressing concerns. Once, back in collage, I was given a task to write about, draw and photograph the view from a specific spot (assigned to me). We were given no instruction on what was expected of us, just told where to sit and in which direction to point myself. I decided to focus on the foreground, middle and background in each of the different media. The text concentrated on a dandelion head that happened to be directly in front of me, describing it almost like an alien landscape. I think this may be what it's like to have that mindset as an adult. It's not unconscious of intent like the child, but certainly similar once you become engrossed.