Local news...not The Onion

[Sean Hayden]

Who gets stoned and threatens the munchies with a gun?! --better put this one in a "hospital" till he's 25.

[Tero]

Male cat lady dead. Eligible gor Darwin award.
....Fire crews were able to put out the fire but found a 66-year-old man and two cats dead inside the home.

Officials say the likely cause of the fire was the man smoking while on oxygen.

https://www.ketv.com/article/lincoln-au ... e/62931082

[Brian Peacock]

lol. Shouldn't laugh, but lol.

[Tero]

Area man mad at DMV
https://www.klkntv.com/man-convicted-of ... d-carrots/

[Tero]

Man servicing senior facility shoots himself
https://www.klkntv.com/man-accidentally ... olice-say/

[Tero]

I know where this site is. I only drive there in daylight, mostly spring and fall. No need for a 78 year old to be driving at night alone.
https://www.klkntv.com/78-year-old-woma ... f-lincoln/

About once a month a man 75-85 drives off into a corn field somewhere at night. And is found dead the next day.

[Sean Hayden]

Better’n shittin the bed I guess.

[Tero]

Sad
https://www.1011now.com/2024/12/19/colu ... ds-narcan/
he would have been better off just dying

[Tero]

Plane passenger is sentenced in Omaha after yelling ‘God is real’ and scuffling with flight crew
.... Shortly after the aircraft’s external doors were closed following boarding, and as the plane was taxiing toward the runway, Orban reportedly began yelling about God and demons.

He left his seat, ran to the front of the plane and began banging on the cabin door and tried to open it, according to a media statement by Lehr. Orban physically struggled with a flight attendant who got between Orban and the cockpit door.

He was subdued by passengers and removed from the airplane before takeoff.
https://nebraskaexaminer.com/briefs/pla ... ight-crew/

[Tero]

Man in town for funeral from his one son murdering another son.
https://www.klkntv.com/father-of-lincol ... olice-say/

[Tero]

LINCOLN, Neb. (KLKN) – Police are seeking two burglars who tried stealing an ATM from a west Lincoln strip club in November.
https://www.klkntv.com/watch-burglars-t ... trip-club/

[Tero]

Pizzagate man was a passenger in a felon's car..that got stopped by police...and...
https://www.cnn.com/2025/01/09/politics ... id=ios_app

[Tero]

Drunk driver runs off...
https://www.klkntv.com/man-hid-from-off ... olice-say/
...to hide in a liquor store.

[Tero]

Area criminal really into driving.
https://www.1011now.com/2025/02/10/man- ... utType=amp
He comes from a town with one motel, two gas stations and a couple of bars.

[Tero]

Area kayaker in Chile has...
https://www.ketv.com/article/humpback-w ... l/63788185
...newsworthy encounter and 15 minutes of fame.