Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

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Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by FBM » Sat Jul 07, 2012 5:31 am

:wing-nut:

Krayton Kerns, Republican Montana Legislator, Says Bison Move Could Lead To Higher Gas Prices


A Tea Party lawmaker in Montana said the relocation of 60 bison -- which he blamed on Walt Disney's creation of "Bambi" -- could lead to gas jumping to $25 a gallon as part of a liberal federal government plot.

Rep. Krayton Kerns (R-Laurel) used a posting on his blog, "Ramblings of a Conservative Cow Doctor," to outline what he said was a four-part plan by the federal government to protect bison while leading to dramatic gas price hikes. Kerns, a three-term legislator and veterinarian, is a frequent speaker at Tea Party gatherings throughout Montana.

Kerns said the moving of 60 bison from Yellowstone National Park to the Fort Peck Native American Reservation this winter is part of "a four step process to crush the republic and bring our populace into perfect dependence on big government -- just as Karl Marx dreamed." He said the first part involved Walt Disney's creation of the popular fictional deer "Bambi," which he said allowed people to raise the stature of animals and caused the teaching of the environment in schools, which he said stopped worship of God.

Kerns said the second step came from the federal government debating making the bison the national mammal, and changes to water conservation rules in Montana. He said this is why the federal government moved the bison to the reservation, which is located in the Missouri Breaks region of the Upper Plains.

Kerns then predicted the next two steps of the process, which would involve a rapid population growth of bison in the Missouri Breaks that will be higher than the gray wolf population. He said the thousands of bison, combined with unrest in the Middle East will lead to the gas price hike.

"The world’s economy will grind to a halt due to instability in the Middle East driving the price of gasoline over $25 per gallon," Kerns wrote. "In desperation, America will attempt to develop the massive Bakken oil reserves of Montana and North Dakota only to learn a future leftist president has issued a moratorium on all oil exploration to protect the habitat of our national mammal, the noble, YNP-origin, American Bison. Think about it."

Kerns writes the columns weekly, with the posts appearing on his website, the Laurel Outlook and the Western Ag Reporter. Kerns' writings take a primarily Tea Party approach, with the legislator embracing Ron Paul's presidential candidacy and noting his travels to Tea Party rallies around Montana.


Planned Parenthood of Montana criticized Kerns in March for a blog posting in which he discussed Sandra Fluke's congressional testimony over contraception funding and a bulldog making $1,000 a month for "stud services" while he was in veterinary school. Kerns denied he was comparing Fluke to the bulldog in the post, according to the Billings Gazette.

On his website, Kerns argues against global warming and the minimum wage, and for the Second Amendment, states' rights and fatherhood. Kerns unsuccessully ran for Montana House speaker in 2010 on a platform of battling the federal government on such issues as wolves and immigration.

"In all of this, the states need to stand up," the Billings Gazette reported Kerns as saying at the time. "So far the states have been the battered spouse of the federal government."
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/0 ... b=facebook

Wtf. Was this guy spouting all this crap when he got elected?


:bb:
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Xamonas Chegwé » Sat Jul 07, 2012 5:38 am

Could this be the world's first, elected poe? :shock:
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by FBM » Sat Jul 07, 2012 5:39 am

If only... :fp:
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by amused » Sat Jul 07, 2012 10:42 am

I think it's way past time that we had minimum intelligence requirements to run for office, and continuing education once you get there. In this case, a loon filter is needed too.

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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Sat Jul 07, 2012 10:44 am

amused wrote:I think it's way past time that we had minimum intelligence requirements to run for office, and continuing education once you get there. In this case, a loon filter is needed too.
There's a great scene in "Religulous" where a senator tells Bill Mahrer: There's no intelligence test for being a senator! (Then he stops and considers what he just said, KNOWING that bit will make it into the movie. :funny: )
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Warren Dew » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:02 pm

Did he give a time frame? 'cause I think gasoline prices will be $25 a gallon by 2050.

Edit: wouldn't mind moving to Montana if I could find an appropriate job there - not because of this, though.

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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by FBM » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:05 pm

How about being a dental floss tycoon? I hear they get on pretty well there...you just need a pygmy pony...
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Tero » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:10 pm

Let's make it easier. Let's just take over. We will need some of our gun nut atheists to help. Enough of this democracy shit.

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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Audley Strange » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:41 pm

At least the guy has an imagination which is white hot.
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by maiforpeace » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:47 pm

Cuckoo!!!

All that bison methane is getting to the guy's head.
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:48 pm

Tero wrote:Let's make it easier. Let's just take over. We will need some of our gun nut atheists to help. Enough of this democracy shit.
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by rasetsu » Sat Jul 07, 2012 1:16 pm




This is what happens when people don't vote. And in Montana, it's not because of apathy, it's because nobody lives there. Even if they get everybody to turn out at the polls, they still can't manage a quorum. In Montana the swing vote is like Schrodinger's ballot box; all it takes is one guy to flip the state from red to blue. All it takes is one person staying home to care for a sick sheep to change the entire political map of the state. (Or more realistically, one sheep appearing unusually coquettish for that time of year.)

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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Tyrannical » Sat Jul 07, 2012 1:30 pm

So, basically he is afraid the federal government is purposely moving endangered species onto oil rich land to prevent future drilling.
That sounds like something the Greens would try.
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Bella Fortuna » Sat Jul 07, 2012 1:39 pm

Can't we get Gallstones to "take care" of this for us? :plot:
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Re: Could we just go ahead and give Montana away?

Post by Ian » Sat Jul 07, 2012 1:43 pm

Bella Fortuna wrote:Can't we get Gallstones to "take care" of this for us? :plot:
Let's have this guy "take care" of this for us:
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