Should you tell girls they are pretty?

[Coito ergo sum]

As a parent, I am constantly struggling with trying to do things right… or, rather, trying not to do things so wrong my kids will be fucked up forever. When you're me, that's way harder than it sounds.

I find myself often going back and forth on whether to tell my daughter that she's pretty. Whether she is pretty isn't a question. She's the prettiest. But do I tell her that?

http://skepchick.org/2012/03/ai-pretty-girls/

I think that telling a little girl she is pretty is fine. Doing so does not mean that the only important thing is looks or that self-esteem depends on looks.

Only the Skepchicks can agonize about something so minor. IMO

[FBM]

Definitely tell little girls they are pretty, especially if they're not. If they're not, you should be even more adamant and OTT about it, so that they'll grow up with a realistic and balanced view of reality, not neurotic about their appearance at all.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABzMAuI1 ... r_embedded#![/youtube]

[maiforpeace]

As a parent, I am constantly struggling with trying to do things right… or, rather, trying not to do things so wrong my kids will be fucked up forever. When you're me, that's way harder than it sounds.

I find myself often going back and forth on whether to tell my daughter that she's pretty. Whether she is pretty isn't a question. She's the prettiest. But do I tell her that?

http://skepchick.org/2012/03/ai-pretty-girls/

I think that telling a little girl she is pretty is fine. Doing so does not mean that the only important thing is looks or that self-esteem depends on looks.

Only the Skepchicks can agonize about something so minor. IMO

I'm sure a lot of parents are concerned about how they guide their children to feel about their appearance. It's not just a girl's issue either. Parents should be equally concerned about their boys, there has been a significant rise in anorexia/bulemia among them, aspiring to be ripped and have six pack abs.

http://ilookbothways.com/2012/02/25/eat ... ys-a-role/

[hadespussercats]

Why not tell girls they're pretty? Just make sure they know that's not the only important trait-- tell them they're smart, too. Or whatever it is they are.

[Gallstones]

Pageant momma's belch wasn't very pretty.

[Drewish]

I always tell little girls that they're pretty, and it keeps getting me into trouble

[laklak]

Well, I guess it beats "your nose is WAY too big and you've got funny sitcky-out teeth".

[Bella Fortuna]

Well, I guess it beats "your nose is WAY too big and you've got funny sitcky-out teeth".

...unless you find that pretty.

[Atheist-Lite]

It is a sexist anachronism that has no place in progressive company.

[Audley Strange]

Social Darwinism through the perpetual denigration of all is the way forward, that way we will end up with a society of bleeding heart neurotics too terrified that they might hurt someone's feeling that they are essentially crippled by it and on the other hand a bunch of raving sociopaths who exploit the shit out of the previous group of morons act like enemies of humanity and then blame then neurotics for the mess. Of course the neurotics agree.

NO CHANGE!!

[JimC]

You're only as pretty as you feel inside...

[FBM]

You're only as pretty as you feel inside...

Uh-oh. I'd better stay inside for a while, then.

[Rum]

There is a sexism issue here isn't there? We don't (usually anyway) tell boys how handsome they are. So why do we tell girls they are pretty? To assure them they will be sexually attractive to males? Even if this is done unconsciously I think it does say something about the sexual politics of these things.

Sorry to be all serious and such..

[PsychoSerenity]

Definitely tell little girls they are pretty, especially if they're not. If they're not, you should be even more adamant and OTT about it, so that they'll grow up with a realistic and balanced view of reality, not neurotic about their appearance at all.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABzMAuI1 ... r_embedded#![/youtube]

Holy Fuck. That is dreadful.

[Audley Strange]

I think you are utterly wrong Rum. I hear mothers and girlfriends and friends of boys and young men comment all the time about the looks of young men. Sexual politics? Nah, just a bit of sometimes false confidence to help a bunch of emotionally bewildered often insecure group of children and young adults, if not actual pride in the person they are complimenting.

To be honest I think the whole idea of sexual politics is an insane doctrine made up by people who felt they were losers at some game and thus wished to change the rules in order to win, you know like a 3 year old being beat at monopoly might, and being a good parent you let them, for an easy life?

If I say to my good lady she looks great, or a young woman that her ass looks fantastic in that skirt, or to a young guy that he looks good in that suit, it's because that is what I think. It's not meant to flatter or embolden them, it's simply a comment in the same way as "I can't believe you eat liver!" is.