Proof that Dick Cheney has a heart.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

He just got it.

[Bella Fortuna]

First time for everything.

[Bella Fortuna]

Best quip:

‎"The pump also requires an energy source, either an external battery, or in Cheney’s case, demon’s ichor pumped from the subterranean lair of the pre-Euclidian god of madness Yog-Sothoth." -- Stephen Colbert

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Best quip:

‎"The pump also requires an energy source, either an external battery, or in Cheney’s case, demon’s ichor pumped from the subterranean lair of the pre-Euclidian god of madness Yog-Sothoth." -- Stephen Colbert

[maiforpeace]

I liked the Borowitz Report's version better.

Cheney Receives Heart Transplant; Bush Still on Waiting List for Brain

Halliburton Performs Reconstruction of Former VP

FALLS CHURCH, VA (The Borowitz Report) – Former Vice President Dick Cheney received a heart transplant today, but former President George W. Bush remained on a waiting list for a brain, hospital officials confirmed.

As part of a government contract signed while he was still Vice President, Halliburton performed the reconstruction work on Mr. Cheney’s circulatory system at a cost to taxpayers of $14.2 billion.

The doctor who performed the surgery called the procedure “extremely invasive – just the way the Vice President wanted it.”

A hospital spokesman said that Mr. Cheney was expected to make a full recovery, but that he was “somewhat disoriented” coming out of anesthesia: “When we asked him who the President of the United States was, he said, ‘Is it still me?’”

Minutes later, though, Mr. Cheney was reportedly alert, chatting with his doctors, and shooting people in the face.

Former President Bush made an appearance at the former Vice President’s hospital, hanging a “Mission Accomplished” banner in Mr. Cheney’s room hours before the operation was completed.

[tattuchu]

I'm sure his body will reject it. Too much of a shock to the system.

By the way, the article on HuffPo is full of fawning sycophants in the comments section. Why? Critical comments aren't making it past the mods
Even when I tried to sneak this by: "All the beast, you weevil pizza Schmidt."

[tattuchu]

I liked the Borowitz Report's version better.

Cheney Receives Heart Transplant; Bush Still on Waiting List for Brain

Halliburton Performs Reconstruction of Former VP

FALLS CHURCH, VA (The Borowitz Report) – Former Vice President Dick Cheney received a heart transplant today, but former President George W. Bush remained on a waiting list for a brain, hospital officials confirmed.

As part of a government contract signed while he was still Vice President, Halliburton performed the reconstruction work on Mr. Cheney’s circulatory system at a cost to taxpayers of $14.2 billion.

The doctor who performed the surgery called the procedure “extremely invasive – just the way the Vice President wanted it.”

A hospital spokesman said that Mr. Cheney was expected to make a full recovery, but that he was “somewhat disoriented” coming out of anesthesia: “When we asked him who the President of the United States was, he said, ‘Is it still me?’”

Minutes later, though, Mr. Cheney was reportedly alert, chatting with his doctors, and shooting people in the face.

Former President Bush made an appearance at the former Vice President’s hospital, hanging a “Mission Accomplished” banner in Mr. Cheney’s room hours before the operation was completed.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

I'm going to post that to the wrong Piss Your Pants thread right now!

[maiforpeace]

I'm sure his body will reject it. Too much of a shock to the system.

By the way, the article on HuffPo is full of fawning sycophants in the comments section. Why? Critical comments aren't making it past the mods
Even when I tried to sneak this by: "All the beast, you weevil pizza Schmidt."

Yea, I unregistered to comment because they are inconsistent about posting comments...some moderators take forever to read them, other's are Nazi's about what they allow. But I will look for your comments, what do you call yourself over there?

I'm going to post that to the wrong Piss Your Pants thread right now!

[Bella Fortuna]

I liked the Borowitz Report's version better.

Cheney Receives Heart Transplant; Bush Still on Waiting List for Brain

Halliburton Performs Reconstruction of Former VP

FALLS CHURCH, VA (The Borowitz Report) – Former Vice President Dick Cheney received a heart transplant today, but former President George W. Bush remained on a waiting list for a brain, hospital officials confirmed.

As part of a government contract signed while he was still Vice President, Halliburton performed the reconstruction work on Mr. Cheney’s circulatory system at a cost to taxpayers of $14.2 billion.

The doctor who performed the surgery called the procedure “extremely invasive – just the way the Vice President wanted it.”

A hospital spokesman said that Mr. Cheney was expected to make a full recovery, but that he was “somewhat disoriented” coming out of anesthesia: “When we asked him who the President of the United States was, he said, ‘Is it still me?’”

Minutes later, though, Mr. Cheney was reportedly alert, chatting with his doctors, and shooting people in the face.

Former President Bush made an appearance at the former Vice President’s hospital, hanging a “Mission Accomplished” banner in Mr. Cheney’s room hours before the operation was completed.

[tattuchu]

I'm sure his body will reject it. Too much of a shock to the system.

By the way, the article on HuffPo is full of fawning sycophants in the comments section. Why? Critical comments aren't making it past the mods
Even when I tried to sneak this by: "All the beast, you weevil pizza Schmidt."

Yea, I unregistered to comment because they are inconsistent about posting comments...some moderators take forever to read them, other's are Nazi's about what they allow. But I will look for your comments, what do you call yourself over there?

tattuchu

[maiforpeace]

I'm sure his body will reject it. Too much of a shock to the system.

By the way, the article on HuffPo is full of fawning sycophants in the comments section. Why? Critical comments aren't making it past the mods
Even when I tried to sneak this by: "All the beast, you weevil pizza Schmidt."

Yea, I unregistered to comment because they are inconsistent about posting comments...some moderators take forever to read them, other's are Nazi's about what they allow. But I will look for your comments, what do you call yourself over there?

tattuchu

You are the only reason why I would even read them, because I don't anymore.

[Tyrannical]

No one said it was a human heart

[Gawdzilla Sama]

No one said it was a human heart

Or even Halal.

[mistermack]

This is bad news for people who need a transplant.
It hardly encourages you to go on a donor list, knowing that an asshole like Cheyney might get your heart.