Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

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Jerome23
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Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Jerome23 » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:20 pm

In the light of the latest from RD: http://forum.richarddawkins.net/view...?f=60&t=110356 I just thought I would make an offer of conducting a mass baptism for anyone who feels like expressing their distaste by apostatising. My plan involved a drive thru car wash, some loud music, and lots of booze, and a ritual reading with comic assent of Answers in Genesis literature and Chick Tracts. I believe this is how one conducts such things? I can see that not actually believing in God you might not want to become Anglicans, so might I suggest you consider becoming Discordians? I will invest each and every interested part as a Pope: you can find the Holy Book here -- http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/5.php

A rousing chorus of the Erisian Hymn should follow. http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/26.php

Actually I'm vaguely serious, shall we have a piss up in Oxford as a wake for the forum? We could invite RD to show no hard feelings, and even Josh, who I'm sure is ok really.
So any converts?
j x
I am really boring and long winded: prejudice declared
My blog: http://jerome23.wordpress.com/

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Heresiarch
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Heresiarch » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:28 pm

Jerome23 wrote:In the light of the latest from RD: http://forum.richarddawkins.net/view...?f=60&t=110356 I just thought I would make an offer of conducting a mass baptism for anyone who feels like expressing their distaste by apostatising. My plan involved a drive thru car wash, some loud music, and lots of booze, and a ritual reading with comic assent of Answers in Genesis literature and Chick Tracts. I believe this is how one conducts such things? I can see that not actually believing in God you might not want to become Anglicans, so might I suggest you consider becoming Discordians? I will invest each and every interested part as a Pope: you can find the Holy Book here -- http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/5.php

A rousing chorus of the Erisian Hymn should follow. http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/26.php

Actually I'm vaguely serious, shall we have a piss up in Oxford as a wake for the forum? We could invite RD to show no hard feelings, and even Josh, who I'm sure is ok really.
So any converts?
j x
If you go for a meal: NO HOT DOG BUNS!

That is all.

Hail Eris!

Edit: One day Jack Chick will be recognized as a true comic genius.

That was not all.

Hail.
Hail.
Hail.
Last edited by Heresiarch on Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The Hell Law says that Hell is reserved exclusively for them that
believe in it. Further, the lowest Rung in Hell is reserved for them that
believe in it on the supposition that they'll go there if they don't.
-- Honest Book of Truth; The Gospel According to Fred, 3:1

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Heresiarch
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Heresiarch » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:29 pm

Ack. :evil:
The Hell Law says that Hell is reserved exclusively for them that
believe in it. Further, the lowest Rung in Hell is reserved for them that
believe in it on the supposition that they'll go there if they don't.
-- Honest Book of Truth; The Gospel According to Fred, 3:1

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Jerome23
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Jerome23 » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:30 pm

You don't count Heresiarch, you are already POEE! ;)

j x
I am really boring and long winded: prejudice declared
My blog: http://jerome23.wordpress.com/

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War Arrow
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by War Arrow » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:30 pm

I'm actually in Coventry so I'm not that far... and ANY reason to get out of this city is a good reason. So yes. Sounds good.
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Bella Fortuna
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Bella Fortuna » Wed Feb 24, 2010 8:33 pm

Do we get free wine?
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M
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by M » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:09 pm

Pawiz will do it if you offer him a choir boy (and it isn't Lozzer).
Bloody Greta Garbo

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TBickle
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by TBickle » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:09 pm

I'm saved!! I just have a couple questions though. What was in that wine and why does my ass hurt so bad?

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M
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by M » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:11 pm

TBickle wrote:I'm saved!! I just have a couple questions though. What was in that wine and why does my ass hurt so bad?
Sorry, when you said "Put that crucifix in the rectory" I thought you said "rectum".
Bloody Greta Garbo

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95Theses
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by 95Theses » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:15 pm

I'm only coming if we have bowls of communion wafers to snack on
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. - Bertrand Russell.

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M
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by M » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:40 pm

I bet Dev wees in the font.
Bloody Greta Garbo

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Matt H
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Matt H » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:42 pm

95Theses wrote:I'm only coming if we have bowls of communion wafers to snack on
Mmmm body of Christ...

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ficklefiend
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by ficklefiend » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:42 pm

Aberdeen is so far from the rest of the country sometimes...

If my sins are forgiven, does that mean I can finally go into a church without getting a nasty static charge off the carpets? I also keep having lucifer popping up and whispering in my ear, can you fix this?
Set phasers tae malky!
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by Pensioner » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:47 pm

I would have to drink 8 pints before loose my hard feelings. Know what I mean?

No of course you don’t you Christian git. :hehe:
“I wish no harm to any human being, but I, as one man, am going to exercise my freedom of speech. No human being on the face of the earth, no government is going to take from me my right to speak, my right to protest against wrong, my right to do everything that is for the benefit of mankind. I am not here, then, as the accused; I am here as the accuser of capitalism dripping with blood from head to foot.”

John Maclean (Scottish socialist) speech from the Dock 1918.

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campermon
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Re: Jerome's Offer: Mass Baptism for would be converts

Post by campermon » Wed Feb 24, 2010 10:04 pm

Jerome23 wrote: Actually I'm vaguely serious, shall we have a piss up in Oxford as a wake for the forum? We could invite RD to show no hard feelings, and even Josh, who I'm sure is ok really.
So any converts?
j x
Sounds like a good idea! :cheers:

When is Beelzebub Richard back from the underworld Australia?

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