Bullying

[Cunt]

I've been bothered by the accepted approach to addressing bullying in schools, and other areas, for awhile now.

It always seems that the focus is on those who bully, and banding together as victims and supporters against their behaviour.

To me, that kind of looks like bullying. (but then again, I got loopy reading G.E.B., and maybe am influenced by it)

So I have bullied. I've also regretted bullying. I could give examples, but basically, I think the most valuable contribution we can make to improving this is not to get together with a bunch of people who say they never do it.

Hell, how would they even know anything about it if they haven't done it?

How have you bullied others? When you found yourself doing so, what did you do to stop it, or remedy it?

I'll post an example in a response.

[Cunt]

So a recent bullying story - I was making Trump-jokes, and Trump-supporter jokes, and realized that the feeling was ebulient, but not a very good one.

I don't really care about Trump, but EVERYONE is very cool with saying horrible things about him, or his supporters.

If this isn't bullying, I don't know what would qualify.

This example is the one I offer first, because some of you may have had the same experience. It might not seem like bullying, but if you picture a young person, with republican views, being silent out of fear of being mocked by the clearly left-leaning group, maybe you CAN see it that way.

There are other examples, but this is so common, I would guess more than a few of us could identify with it.

[Brian Peacock]

You're expecting us, I mean like everyone, to be better than the people we elect perhaps?

[Cunt]

You're expecting us, I mean like everyone, to be better than the people we elect perhaps?

No, I'm expecting you, Brian Peacock, to look honestly at your own actions, and see if you can find a place where you were a bully, if you can.

You can make a corrective effort, if you are really lucky. I would encourage you to share that story.

Oh, and I don't think we are better than our leaders. I used to think of government as 'they', but it stopped when I grew up and realized that they are us.

Doesn't matter to the case though, as I was just trying to look at a simple example of me bullying. It is, so many say, an important topic at the moment.

I've also been a victim of bullying, but there is plenty of discussion of that. It might even be improving things...

I don't like bullying. I don't like cry-bullying either. Choosing my experimental target as Trump was deliberate - if he can't take the low-quality mocking of some Cunt tucked away in the Canadian tundra, he probably shouldn't be in the public eye.

[pErvinalia]

Hell, how would they even know anything about it if they haven't done it?

Because they've been on the receiving end of it?

I crossed the line into bullying a couple of times in my younger days, and it's something that causes me shame. Interestingly these days I kind of adopt your idea of 'bullies knowing how other bullies work', and use it to bully bullies. The best way to shut a bully down is to bully them hard. Bullies are weak and usually back down in the face of reciprocal treatment. Having said that, if they have the protection of an authority (like the moderators at ratskep, for example), then you usually end up paying the price yourself.

[pErvinalia]

So a recent bullying story - I was making Trump-jokes, and Trump-supporter jokes, and realized that the feeling was ebulient, but not a very good one.

I don't really care about Trump, but EVERYONE is very cool with saying horrible things about him, or his supporters.

Well their actions have potentially severe consequences. People shouldn't be free from responsibility for their actions.

[Cunt]

Hell, how would they even know anything about it if they haven't done it?

Because they've been on the receiving end of it?

I crossed the line into bullying a couple of times in my younger days, and it's something that causes me shame. Interestingly these days I kind of adopt your idea of 'bullies knowing how other bullies work', and use it to bully bullies. The best way to shut a bully down is to bully them hard. Bullies are weak and usually back down in the face of reciprocal treatment. Having said that, if they have the protection of an authority (like the moderators at ratskep, for example), then you usually end up paying the price yourself.

Wow, what an asshole thing to say about the moderators at ratskep.

I could make a similar case against the mods here (I did, maybe)

This should maybe hint at you that it isn't the moderators...it might not be any 'they'. Maybe it's us.

When you bully bullies, do you do it only where you are safe to do it? I think it is a critical feature of bullying, that the bully is safe from retaliation...

Anyway, thanks for chiming in, and for bullying the anonymous mods on another board. Great example!

[pErvinalia]

They've not anonymous and I've bullied a couple of them plenty of times to their (online) faces.

And yes, like anything, I only act in a reasonably safe manner. That applies to online and in real life. It doesn't surprise me that this idea is foreign to someone who thinks like you do.

[Cunt]

So wait - you get aggressive to people only when it is safe for you to do so?

I think we may be zeroing in on a key feature of bullying.

Will you honestly help me try to make a clear definition of it? I'm going running, I'll give it some thought.

In case you are interested, I'll take a snow-covered bush trail (nearly all singletrack) around Frame Lake, and then through Somba K'e Park and home again.

[pErvinalia]

So wait - you get aggressive to people only when it is safe for you to do so?

Of course, unless it involves a threat to my kids. It would be retarded to get aggressive at people where there was a reasonable chance your safety was at threat. And it depends what levels we are talking about. I'm happy to punch on if it's really necessary, but I'm not an ideological loon who is willing to die to make a point. I assume you are, given your incredulity to the thoroughly reasonable proposition that one takes their own safety into regard before acting.

Will you honestly help me try to make a clear definition of it?

You don't have an honest bone in your body.

In case you are interested, I'll take a snow-covered bush trail (nearly all singletrack) around Frame Lake, and then through Somba K'e Park and home again.

Don't get hypothermia.

[Cunt]

It's good to know how seriously to take you. Thanks for that.

[rainbow]

It's good to know how seriously to take you. Thanks for that.

Your mother was a hamster.

[pErvinalia]

That might explain a few things..

[Rum]

I can't recall ever bullying anyone ever. I can't recall being bullied either. I was always a bit bigger and taller than average at school so I tended to be left alone. I had one single fight when I was about 14 or 15 but I don't remember what started it. It wasn't being bullied or the reverse so far as I recall.

[Gord]

I bully people all the time, but only the ones with tiny hands.