Thank god for monkey sex!

[Jesus_of_Nazareth]

When one thinks of the random wriggling of billions of sperm, over hundreds of thousands of successful fucks, leading to a unique I, the mind boggles...

Yeah, it's the mind boggling end of things that makes my brain hurt..... all it would have taken was one monkey (out of squillions?) fancying a banana or sticking it up her shitter instead of doing exactly what it did at that exact time and I would not be here.......

[Jason]

Would it be unethical to purchase a large monkey and train it to have sex with me?

[Blind groper]

Blow up dolls don't answer back.

[mistermack]

When one thinks of the random wriggling of billions of sperm, over hundreds of thousands of successful fucks, leading to a unique I, the mind boggles...

Yeah, it's the mind boggling end of things that makes my brain hurt..... all it would have taken was one monkey (out of squillions?) fancying a banana or sticking it up her shitter instead of doing exactly what it did at that exact time and I would not be here.......

With those kinds of odds against, it's perfectly obvious that the universe was fine-tuned for you to be born.
Your existence against those unbelieveable odds proves it.

But wait a minute, what about me .......... . . . ?

[Audley Strange]

Would it be unethical to purchase a large monkey and train it to have sex with me?

Yes a monkey is a living creature and should not be bought or sold. Capture one in a net, then fuck it.