Post
by Mephistopheles » Sat Mar 06, 2010 1:19 am
Oh cool. We have one here as well.
Let's see:
Iron Man - solid superhero movie, but unoriginal and transparent, hardly deserving the hype it got.
Dark Knight - same. Though less transparent and more jarringly realistic. I miss Burton's Batman.
Juno - indieness for the sake of indieness
Ratatouille/Wall-E/Up/Every Pixar movie after Incredibles - the themes are all the same, just applied to different unconvential characters. Wall-E had zero character development, half of it boring as hell and the second half a ripoff of 2001. Up didn't deserve best picture nor screenplay; same cookie-cutter plot only applied to terrible art direction. Too inconsistent to feel like a coherent world, not quirky enough to be interesting.
Toy Story - Why not? Sure, it was revolutionary, but retrospectively it's not the strongest of the Pixar canon. That, and its success is the reason why Pixar is scared to stray from the same screenplay themes for the past decade.
2001: A Space Odyssey. Long and boring as hell. Plus Kubrick's fascination with "pop" Classical music bugs the shit out of me.
A Clockwork Orange - same thing with the music. Because everyone knows that you're a music connoisseur when the only two songs you've ever listened to are "Singin' in the Rain" and Beethoven's 9th.
American Beauty - transcendentalist bullshit.
Sound of Music - Rodger's and Hammerstein can't write music for shit. Let's throw in every R&H musical movie ever made.
Sweeney Todd - the movie was good, but not great. Film was a great medium to do the gore justice, but unfortunately the actors don't have the pipes for the songs.
Every single broadway musical adaptation.
The Matrix - the premise was great, the plot was terrible. A huge WTF ending. And this is all ignoring the two sequels whose existence I still refuse to acknowledge.
Sin City/The Spirit/300/Watchmen - beautiful art direction; little else going on for them.
Gone with the Wind. Scarlett's a bitch. Rhett's a man-whore. In civil war Georgia. Thanks for transferring the other 1200 pages of sub-par novella to a 3 hour bore-fest.
Tarantino movies minus Kill Bill. Shoot-em-ups with way too much dialogue, the lot of them.
Bruckheimer films sans Pirates of the Caribbean (the first one). Pacing, man, pacing. And Cage can't act for shit. Also, too much conspiracy.
Cameron films, excluding Alien. All flash, no substance.
About half of the Burton films. All artsy, same substance.
Howard films. Just go DIAF.
Nearly every war/sports/romance/horror/thriller movie ever made.
Pretty much every "comedian-driven" movie ever made.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand
Religulous. Bill Maher is a strident, sophomoric asshole who doesn't know the first thing about why religion is bullshit. No one on either side of the argument cares to hear a guy ask people if they believe in a talking snake for nearly two hours.